Matric finals are a stressful time for learners. However, the stress that their parents go through during this time is often overlooked. Often, parents are overwhelmed with trying to support their children during their matric finals.
They fear they may say the wrong thing before or after an exam or struggle with identifying and catering to their child’s needs during this stressful time.
A clinical social worker, André Weavers, says some of the common mistakes parents tend to make during matric finals is having unrealistic expectations of their children. For example, expecting their child to obtain high marks, when the child is an average learner or has learning barriers.
Common mistakes parents make
Expectations like this often contribute to the child developing feelings like being overwhelmed and pressurised which often results in the child performing out of the fear of disappointing their parents.
Other common mistakes parents could make is comparing their children with their siblings or peers.
This adds a great layer of stress as the child feels the need to compete with children who may be academically stronger than them.
Parents often times do not create a conducive study environment for their children during exams. Weavers explains that although not all houses have adequate space to study, parents should still be mindful and keep social gatherings at their home to a minimum during their child’s examination period.
Weavers has five specific tips, which he calls the “smart” concept, that he would like parents to implement during their child’s matric finals.
S: Set specific goals with your child in terms of the actual exams and their desired outcomes. Design a tailor made study programme and stick to it as far as possible.
M: Make time for your child. Check in regularly and create a positive environment at home, this will reduce fear and anxiety.
A: As a parent your positive attitude will rub off on your child. Affirm your child after each exam. Regardless of the outcome remain positive and believe in your child’s abilities.
R: Rest. Allow the child to take enough breaks, get enough sleep and rest during the exams. This will reduce fatigue and lack of energy to study.
T: Teamwork. Your child’s outcome of the exam will be a reflection of the teamwork between parent and child during the exams. Ensure that you and your child work together to get through the exam. You are you child’s biggest cheer leader. After all teamwork, makes the dream work.
Weavers also places great emphasis on parents providing ample emotional support during exams. He says, “Parents often focus only on the result, forgetting that from the start to the completion of the exam, it is a journey, which they need to walk alongside their child.”
